Thursday, November 6th 2008

By molly horton

     “Oh baby, don’t stop now, you’re killing me”

     Sound familiar? Whether or not you have ever been in a situation where your partner or yourself does not achieve orgasm during sexual activity, you have probably heard of the term “blue balls.” This is a slang term that Discovery Health defined as “the testicular aching which may occur when the blood that fills the vessels in a male’s genital area during sexual arousal is not dissipated by orgasm.” 

     The slang term probably came from the bluish tinge the testicles take on during the phenomenon, but the real word for it is vasocongestion. It is due to the depletion of oxygen within the blood when it pools for a long period of time within the prostate region.

     Vasocongestion occurs when a male becomes sexually excited; the arteries carrying the blood to the genitals enlarge and the blood vessels constrict. Discovery Health reported that this uneven blood flow causes more blood to become trapped in the penis and testicles causing an erection and increasing the size of the testicles, in some cases, up to 50 per cent.

     If an orgasm is reached and ejaculation occurs, the arteries return to normal size and the penis and testicles follow suit in a short time. However, if an orgasm does not occur, Discovery Canada reports that a feeling of “heaviness, aching and discomfort” may occur.

     While this is an actual occurrence that males experience, it is only a relatively mild and temporary discomfort. Vasocongestion is used as a rather convenient and persuasive excuse for why an orgasm is necessary. The important thing to remember, however, is that while this is an actual phenomenon, it is not painful and certainly not permanently damaging to male genitals. 

     Females can experience vasocongestion as well, however it is usually referred to as pelvic congestion. The slang term for this condition is known as “pink ovaries.” Similar to the male genitals, the female genitals become engorged with blood during heightened sexual arousal. An orgasm quickly dissipates the increased volume and blood flow to the genitals. Without an orgasm, however, it takes longer for this to occur. 

     The most obvious way to alleviate the discomfort caused by this condition is to orgasm, through sexual activity or masturbation. However, without any action from yourself or your partner, the symptoms should subside within in the hour. Other suggestions for treating this phenomenon, according to Heather Corinna, sex education writer, are a cold or warm compress, ibuprofen or aspirin for pain relief or some physical activity such as walking or running. It is also important to remember that vasoconstriction and pelvic congestion do not cause permanent damage.

     The importance of knowing about vasocongestion, beyond general curiosity, means that your sex life will be enlightened by knowledge about what is happening with your own body and your partner’s.

     As Discovery Health wrote, “Men who believe that they should ejaculate every time they have an erection are likely to exert pressure on their partner to proceed with sex without taking her feelings into consideration. Some men find that masturbation is a viable solution and are realizing that ejaculation is not a requirement in every sexual situation. This attitude allows both men and their partners to relax more and to learn that pleasure and meaning can exist without having to reach ejaculation and orgasm during every sexual encounter.”

     Knowing your own body and being realistic about sexual experiences can take the pressure off in intimate situations. The idea of “blue balls” has been used in the past as what Corinna referred to as “an all too handy excuse for sexual guilt-tripping.” Realizing that this phenomenon happens to both men and women and that it causes no short term or long term damage will allow you to feel more comfortable in sexual situations. 

     Sex therapist Tracy Cox argued that the more you “educate yourself—the more you know about sex, the more you can feel in control.” This goes for both men and women. Understanding the way your body becomes aroused both mentally and physically can improve your sex life.

     Finally, the phenomenon of vasocongestion and pelvic congestion ultimately boils down to an issue of trust and respect.  Taking part in sexual activity with someone who respects you and whom you can trust will result in a much more satisfying experience. Knowing the facts means you won’t feel pressured by false information or be confused as to what’s going on with your body.

     Of course, ladies, if you’re seeking revenge you now have the ammunition. I know I will, but remember to play fair.

Tags: pain relief, penis, sexual partner, vasocongestion