Conversing with strangers: finding community at Mac

Shamudi Gunasekera
The Silhouette

“Hey, how are you?”
“I’m good, how are you?”
“Good.”
And it goes on.

Ever since my arrival at university last fall, I’ve heard these conversations erupt all around me. At coffee shops, in lecture halls, at the grocery store, no matter where I go I can’t seem to avoid overhearing such painfully (to my ears, at least) mundane conversations that appear to go nowhere.

My attempts at such conversations result in an awkward silence with the other person checking their phone and me simply staring off into the distance and shifting nervously from one foot to the other, wishing I was at home in my bed, surrounded by my books and wrapped in the warmth of my enormous blanket.

I’m so accustomed to diving into familiar topics with friends and family that I’ve forgotten how to converse with strangers. Or perhaps I wasn’t equipped with such a skill in the first place.

And so, my first year at university passed with me connecting with a bare minimum of people, people who I know through friends and housemates and people from my high school who chose to attend the same university.

This year would be different, I promised myself. This year I would try and embrace the uncomfortable presence of others.

And embrace it I did. The morning of Clubsfest I wandered around campus, signing up for various activities that piqued my interest.

When I showed up to my first dance practice, I was extremely nervous. My housemates did not sign up with me so I was on my own. Everyone else seemed to have a friend. I wanted to run back into the safety of my blanket.

Instead, I took a deep breath and approached someone.

At first, I did encounter many who were as awkward as I was, who didn’t seem interested in making conversation, or who couldn’t get past making polite conversation. But then I encountered the rare gems that were surprisingly easy to talk to. Not too long ago, I decided to attend a board game night held by one of the clubs I am now a part of. It was quite a small gathering of people, and everyone seemed comfortable with each other. I seated myself at the very edge of the couch as I watched everyone play. The person next to me kept asking for my opinion for which cards he should choose for the game of Cards Against Humanity. I was a stranger to him, but I enjoyed the ease at which the conversation started. There was no questioning of what program I was in, nor was there an awkward pause where we knew not what to say.

Little by little, I found other such people. I had to endure a number of dull conversations, but I found people who I had things in common with, who didn’t ask the same questions over and over again. And as I kept going to more practices and meetings, I interacted with them more and the more I got to know them, the more I liked them. I enjoy hearing people laugh as they tell me their stories, the corners of their eyes crinkling up, a certain light discount cialis and viagra in their eyes as they go to far off places only they can see.

I still have trouble talking to strangers, but once the conversation gets past the monotonous questions that I’ve answered too many times, we actually become friends. Slowly, but surely, I’m getting to the point where I feel comfortable conversing with strangers.