Miranda Babbitt
Assistant LifeStyle Editor
Having a panic attack on Valentine’s Day? First up, breathe. Second, peruse through the following suggestions to some common problemos.
I’m the only one alone!!!
Even though you’re not someone’s “one”, you’re not “the only one” single. 40% of the population won’t be going home to a cuddle-mate. Unless you count your furry friends in the feline and canine world, in which case 56% of us are going home to a glorious night of adorable cuddles. Bonus, they’re not expecting chocolate anytime soon (as in they die from it, yes).
My movie life is bombarded by rom-coms.
Teary eyes on Valentine’s Day are only okay if they’re from ROFLing (but I get if that’s too much physical activity - LMAO is cool too). So ditch the “rom” and stick to the “com”, with the near-classic, Bridesmaids. Or get in touch with your inner cooties-believer and watch “Frozen”, which graced the Oscars so it’s worthy for our adult, cultured eyes.
People think I have no plans.
Well, here is the riskiest but perhaps the easiest: lie. Nothing too grandiose, like saying you’ve been asked by three tall, dark, and handsome men if you would accompany them to Hawaii, but a small, “A fella from my stats class asked if he could make me dinner. Can’t give up a cooked meal on V Day.” Then go on about how you both love food, because I think that’s a universal similarity between all humans on Valentine’s Day. Or, stay moral, and say you’re planning on rounding up a bunch of gals and hitting the clubs (clubs, as in a sleepover for twenty-somethings who love the Notebook).
General anxiety issues.
Let me hear you say, namasteeee! Throw yo hands up in the air! But only if you’re doing a sun salutation, because we want you in that addictive meditative state all yogis strive to achieve. Yoga has the ability to reduce stress and decrease physiological arousal (in terms of symptoms related to stress… yoga doesn’t harm your sex life), so you can walk away super calm and super cool.
I just want someone to buy me a drank.
Turn on some Beyonce and and get your hands dirty! A blood orange margarita promises that Valentine’s Day festivity without the potentially sleazy offer of that guy lurking on you from down the bar. Invite a friend or two over and you’re night is now flawless.
Miranda Babbitt
Assistant LifeStyle Editor
Having a panic attack on Valentine’s Day? First up, breathe. Second, peruse through the following suggestions to some common problemos.
I’m the only one alone!!!
Even though you’re not someone’s “one”, you’re not “the only one” single. 40% of the population won’t be going home to a cuddle-mate. Unless you count your furry friends in the feline and canine world, in which case 56% of us are going home to a glorious night of adorable cuddles. Bonus, they’re not expecting chocolate anytime soon (as in they die from it, yes).
My movie life is bombarded by rom-coms.
Teary eyes on Valentine’s Day are only okay if they’re from ROFLing (but I get if that’s too much physical activity - LMAO is cool too). So ditch the “rom” and stick to the “com”, with the near-classic, Bridesmaids. Or get in touch with your inner cooties-believer and watch “Frozen”, which graced the Oscars so it’s worthy for our adult, cultured eyes.
People think I have no plans.
Well, here is the riskiest but perhaps the easiest: lie. Nothing too grandiose, like saying you’ve been asked by three tall, dark, and handsome men if you would accompany them to Hawaii, but a small, “A fella from my stats class asked if he could make me dinner. Can’t give up a cooked meal on V Day.” Then go on about how you both love food, because I think that’s a universal similarity between all humans on Valentine’s Day. Or, stay moral, and say you’re planning on rounding up a bunch of gals and hitting the clubs (clubs, as in a sleepover for twenty-somethings who love the Notebook).
General anxiety issues.
Let me hear you say, namasteeee! Throw yo hands up in the air! But only if you’re doing a sun salutation, because we want you in that addictive meditative state all yogis strive to achieve. Yoga has the ability to reduce stress and decrease physiological arousal (in terms of symptoms related to stress… yoga doesn’t harm your sex life), so you can walk away super calm and super cool.
I just want someone to buy me a drank.
Turn on some Beyonce and and get your hands dirty! A blood orange margarita promises that Valentine’s Day festivity without the potentially sleazy offer of that guy lurking on you from down the bar. Invite a friend or two over and you’re night is now flawless.
Winter can be a time of wondrous snow days, evenings by the fireplace, and Hallmark holidays. But in addition to the cheerful, colourful festivities of the season, the cold weather also brings forth an onset of cloudy, dark days that can be mirrored in emotions of hopelessness and depression.
The current school year has brought forth several candid confessions from Silhouette staff members and volunteers outlining the effects of an ongoing battle with mental illness. If you find this time of year tends to bring you down and affect your mood, here are a few tips that have worked, and continue to work, in helping me feel more like myself when dealing with depression and anxiety. I cannot guarantee that these will work for everyone, but making these changes have definitely helped me reduce my frequency of panic attacks, and revive the spring in my step when SAD has left me feeling hopeless.
Make time
When I first started speaking with friends who were also struggling with mental illness, one of the things we always seemed to have in common was an inability to keep a schedule. Sleeping was a challenge, making it to class was a burden, and for reasons unknown, we always forgot to eat. This year, I’ve started keeping a schedule that reminds me to keep up with my commitments and my necessary daily habits. It may seem like a pretty basic plan, but keeping a day planner and setting reminders on your phone will help you feel more organized and less stressed.
If you’re finding it difficult to make time for sleep, reschedule your life accordingly. If it takes you two hours to fall asleep, schedule in an extra two hours at bedtime. If you know you’re going to wake up at 3:00 in the morning, have a show queued on your laptop so you have something to lull you back to sleep again. Or even if you have the opposite problem and are sleeping too much, have a trusted friend or relative give you a call to remind you of the world outside your bedroom. Making time for sleep may require you to cut the time you spend on other commitments, but if you’re well rested, you’ll have more time and energy to get caught up the next day.
If you find that you’re forgetting about other important details in your life, such as eating or attending class, write everything down and check off each item as you go. It’s been about a year since I was diagnosed, and I still write down “Eat Lunch” in my day planner- but now I’ve yet to forget! Getting thrown off my school and eating schedules last year led to a drop in my grades and a rise in my weight. Not staying on schedule ended up giving me more worries on top of my pre-existing anxiety conditions. Having a visual outline for your day written on a calendar or in a planner will give you a better understanding of how much time you realistically have in a day.
Treat Yo’ Self
When you’re feeling down, you can’t waste time blaming yourself for your problems. Instead, treat yourself. Make yourself feel good about something rather than berating yourself into feeling worse.
Once a week, I schedule a two-hour time slot where I do something just for me. Put on some inspiring music (pro tip: avoid the Adeles and Lana Del Reys of the world), paint your nails, watch a movie, try a new recipe, do whatever it is that you wish you had more time for during the school year. It will be an instant pick me up that you’ll begin looking forward to every week.
Talk it Out
Talk to someone- a friend, a family member, a professional in the field, or even call a hotline if you don’t feel comfortable speaking with someone who knows you personally. If you’re bottling up your feelings, you’re hurting yourself and hurting others. Not only are you hindering your own chances of speaking about your problems and accepting them, you’re also preventing those around you from gaining a better understanding of what you’re going through.
Talking to yourself can even be a positive option. Don’t necessarily talk to yourself out loud, but writing in a journal or talking out your problems in your head can be beneficial in gaining a better understanding of what your stresses and upsets currently are.
Good Day Sunshine
Getting enough sunlight is crucial in keeping your mood bright. But if like myself you find yourself living, working, and spending a considerable number of classes in basements, you may need to resort to some synthetic forms of sunshine.
Going outside can be cringe-worthy when the term “Polar Vortex” has become a CP24 regular and frosted eyebrows have become a daily fashion statement. An alternative to the classic glowing orb is a sun lamp. I’ve recently ordered one (a little over $100 from Wal-Mart) and I’m highly anticipating its arrival. I’ve heard great things about its ability to both literally and figuratively brighten your day, and living in a basement, it’ll help my body rise naturally with the sun and create a natural schedule to follow.
If you find the darkness of the current weather is really affecting your mood and how you feel about getting out of bed in the morning, a sun lamp can be a beneficial step.
Be nice
Be nice to yourself and be nice to others. Have an inspiring quote set as your desktop background, or reflect on your accomplishments at the end of the day. Complimenting yourself may seem lame, but it will boost your spirits and help you look towards the positives of each day.
And while you’re flattering yourself, let those around you know how much they mean to you. Complimenting someone else will make you feel like a genuinely good person and will leave you feeling more grateful for positive relationships in your life that you may sometimes overlook. You’ll feel good about it, and any recipient of a validating comment or complimentary text message is bound to also benefit from the flattery.
Dealing with depression, anxiety or seasonal affective disorder can leave you feeling hopeless. But taking a few steps in the right direction may have you turning down a path of new hope.
You’re in university. You’re brand new, you’ve been here a while (because let’s be real—every undergraduate year is the equivalent of at least five regular years) or you’re about to leave. But whoever you are, wherever you are, whatever point you’re at – you’ve got to make a decision. And the question remains: to commit or not to commit?
Because even though you’re in university and are on your way to becoming an adult, basically everyday is prefaced with a question mark. And, well, you’re in university (and while I think I’ve established this fact, it’s well worth repeating). So, somehow you have to try to find an answer to your daily question while also keeping up with a mountain of schoolwork and juggling your social life, your sleep schedule, and any job commitments you might have. Opportunity abounds – all that’s left is for you to determine whether or not it’s worth taking it.
As someone who has often been accused of over-committing, I present to you, in no particular order, some of my own considerations on deciding whether or not to make a commitment:
1. Do you have the time?
Now, this may seem really obvious, but you’ve got to look at your own work habits and priorities. Maybe your schedule isn’t that full, but the only thing that gets you through the week is every Thursday night out at Snooty’s with your roommates, and that’s when the commitment takes place. Or maybe you only get things done when your schedule is already full, and so adding one more thing will actually make you more productive.
2. Are you passionate about it?
For some people, this is pretty much the only truly important consideration. For others, if it doesn’t add to their resume, then it’s not high priority. Neither of these ways of thinking can be called wrong, but in my experience, I tend to do a way better job if I actually personally care about the work involved. And this doesn’t mean I find every part of the job meaningful, but it does mean that I find the ultimate point of the endeavour worthwhile.
3. Do you need it?
Have you answered your aforementioned daily question? Do you have at least a general idea of the direction you’re headed in? It could be that you don’t have any clue, in which case it might be a good idea to join something that is potentially “unnecessary.” Or maybe it’s your last couple of years, and you know exactly where you want to be once you graduate, and so you have to make a judgment call based on the state of your resume.
4. What do you hope to gain from it?
Do your expectations align with the reality of the commitment? Have you envisioned yourself accomplishing goals that may not be so feasible outside of your imagination? Is there a lot of grunt work involved? Or maybe it’s a huge commitment – one that can detract from another commitment. You need to decide the potential worth, and this can involve some research and realistic thinking on your part.
5. Is it a long-term role?
Some commitments explicitly require that you take on a contract of more than just one school year. This is especially true with research, or if you’re working with a sensitive group that requires stability and consistency in terms of your presence. So, you’ll have to schedule your future accordingly. It can also be implicit – for example, you might take on a smaller role and envision yourself as the president of the club by the time you’ve reached your fourth year. If this is the case, it’s not only important to adjust your commitments, but to also to into consideration: why do you consider this role to be so important? If you’re uncertain about where you want to be in the next few years, this might be a great indication.
6. Check where the commitment falls on your hierarchy of values.
Sometimes commitments aren’t about leadership roles or your future. They can be about relationships – like planning a date night with your significant other once a week, or calling your grandmother every few days. Or it can be more personal, like actually making it to the gym and identifying the point in the day that you are most likely to actually go. This last sort of commitment is often the hardest kind, because the only person you will let down if you fail to honour the commitment is yourself.
7. Have you recognized that maybe it won’t work out?
Sometimes you have to commit a lot of time and effort to something like an interview or a dense application process, and it’s important to understand that you may not even get the role you’re applying for. In this case, you must evaluate the worth you applying, because not only does the amount of effort you put in determine the quality of your application, but it will also make you consider whether the time you will take up in your application or preparing for your interview will be worthwhile.
Amanda Watkins
LifeStyle Editor
This time last year, I wasn’t completely myself.
Last November I had my first of many panic attacks. I was at my student house attempting to complete an essay that was due two days later, and I broke down. I lost control of my emotions and started screaming and crying. My housemate came rushing to my room because she thought someone had died. I called my parents and my dad drove from Mississauga to Hamilton to bring me home.
I felt hopeless. It was an immense and overwhelming stress and sadness that I couldn’t control no matter what I did.
I talked to my friends and family about the stress I was feeling, and they all assured me that this was a normal thing to happen to someone my age, and that I would bounce back in no time.
But I didn’t. The stress got worse, and suddenly what was once just mental frustration was beginning to disrupt my physical health. I couldn’t sleep, I would forget to eat, I started fainting and was rushed to the hospital on more than one occasion. I had lost control of myself, and thought that if I ignored the warning signs long enough, they would simply just disappear. In an attempt to turn my life back around, I resorted to unhealthy coping mechanisms that included repetitive, ritualized behavior, such as obsessive counting and forcing myself to stay awake.
The stress was tough, but what I didn’t realize at the time was that I was dealing with something greater than everyday worry.
“Everyone has stress, and especially everyone has stress around exam time,” explained Debra Earl, a nurse with the Student Wellness Centre’s Mental Health Team. “But with people who are exposed to a lot of stress, often depression can result.”
Hearing a word like depression used to describe yourself can be shocking and disheartening. Months after that particular breakdown, my inability to focus and sleep continued, and my unhealthy coping mechanisms became a default. After running from my problem for months, I realized that my symptoms were not going to go away on their own and soon after, I was diagnosed with a combination of general anxiety, depression and early signs of obsessive compulsive disorder.
“People will be struggling with a lot of symptoms, with their anxiety, with their depression, trying to manage it on their own, until it affects their academics. Then they realize, this is bigger than me, I can’t do this by myself,” said Earl.
When I was struggling with my health last year, the hardest part about finding help was accepting that I had a problem and asking for help. I was always really “normal” when it came to school, so having troubles with stress was surprising and hard to understand. But even if you don’t have a history of mental illness, during times of high stress, anything is possible.
“People who have never come in before are coming in and its beyond the stage of just dealing with stress, it’s often resulted in an anxiety disorder,” said Earl in reference to a number of students who approach the SWC for help.
Mental illness is not something uncommon among students our age, and it’s not something to be ashamed of either.
In the 2012 Canadian Community Health Survey, 17 per cent of Canadians over the age of 15, approximately 4.9 million individuals, perceived themselves as having a need for mental health care in the past 12 months. It’s not a rare problem, yet for some reason, reaching out for help feels embarrassing and over dramatic.
“It would be better if people came in sooner, but most people don’t come in until a crisis has resulted,” explained Earl when speaking about early diagnosis.
There’s no reason to feel guilty, ashamed, or disappointed for feeling sick. It may not be something you have control over anymore and its ok to seek help for it. If I had dealt with my problem earlier on, I probably would have had a much more positive year and I would have found healthy coping mechanisms earlier on.
Earl encourages students who are having difficulties coping with stress to reconsider their eating and sleeping habits and make time for activities outside of school work.
If your stress is keeping you up at night, interfering with your work, or is making you feel unwell, reach out to a friend, family member, your physician, or one of the many resources on campus. Or even if you find that a friend or relative is acting out of character, initiate discussion, they may just be waiting for someone to approach them.
Running away from your problems is easy at the beginning, but trust me, they’ll catch up to you before you catch up to yourself.
When I was in fourth grade, I missed almost a year of school. My classmates were simply told that I was sick, and they all wrote kind letters wishing me a speedy recovery from my ambiguous illness. Few would have guessed that it was not my physical health that was keeping me out of the classroom. I was too anxious.
Even though I was not in school for several months, I was doing a lot of learning. For instance, I learned that I had Generalized Anxiety Disorder. I received cognitive-behavioural therapy (CBT) and for many years I took the anti-depressant Paxil. Eventually, I was well enough to return to school and thank my classmates for their letters in person.
Today, I no longer take medication and I am quite practiced at handling my anxiety. Yet, one of my newest and most reliable anxiety management techniques was not prescribed by a doctor, or learned in a CBT session.
Rather, it comes from the world of conceptual art.
In conceptual art, ideas take precedence over aesthetics. A representative work is Catalysis, a series of performances from the early 1970s by Adrian Piper, which I studied last year in an art history course. Each performance involved Piper distorting her physical appearance and violating certain social norms in public.
In Catalysis I, for example, Piper soaked her clothes in a mixture of vinegar, eggs, milk and cod buy levitra liver oil for a week, and then wore them on the subway during rush hour. For Catalysis IV, she travelled around New York City with a large red bath towel bulging out of her mouth.
If these acts seem disruptive and confrontational, that was Piper’s intention. As a black female, Piper was already accustomed to being treated differently based on her body. The artist hoped to provoke a complacent public and force people to be more conscious of how they react to “otherness.”
I have never walked around with a bath towel stuffed in my mouth, but I do think of Catalysis sometimes when I experience mild social anxiety. When my jokes are met with silence, for instance, or I misuse an ungainly, pretentious word like “potent” in a class discussion, I imagine that I am a conceptual artist like Piper. I focus on the idea that both my gaffe and people’s responses are part of an elaborate performance art piece.
Obviously, reflecting on conceptual art is not a solution for severe anxiety, or other serious problems related to mental illness. Far superior resources are available at the Student Wellness Centre. Yet, I genuinely find that playing pretend in this way can occasionally help to quell some of my social anxiety and embarrassment.
Conceptual art is often denigrated as frivolous or foolish. Indeed, some may dismiss Catalysis on these grounds. These people might be surprised to find out that Piper also has a doctorate from Harvard University, where her supervisor was the legendary political philosopher John Rawls.
To me, however, my relationship with Catalysis absolutely affirms the value of conceptual art. Piper’s work has changed the way that I see the world around me, and I don’t think that there is anything more one can ask from a piece of art, be it a painting or performance.
Conceptual art is powerful; that’s one claim I am not anxious about making.
Emma Suschkov
The Silhouette
Remember in high school when there were tests and assignments due all the time? female viagra cream Each was worth about 5% so they really piled ‘em on. And yet somehow, everyone made it through reasonably well.
Skip forward to university. Tons of people (myself included) have a day off and there are only a couple of assignments in each course per semester (generally). So it should be manageable, right?
It all feels so manageable until that one week comes when I have four midterms, two essays, and a lab due. The week draws closer and closer and it seems as though the muscles in my shoulders will never relax again. How much does a massage cost? (Don’t be ridiculous, I don’t have time for a massage right now.)
I always tell myself to start studying and working early but no matter what, there is always last-minute cramming. I subconsciously attempt to solve calculus equations while writing an essay on autopilot. Then I read over what I wrote and it’s absolute gibberish and on top of that I still have no idea what calculus is. How can I possibly be expected to know all of this information? All of the subjects are just running together.
I keep getting advice – make sure you get enough sleep, take breaks every so many minutes, blah, blah, blah – but I can’t make time for something so unnecessary as sleep when there’s a month-and-a-half’s worth of five courses’ subject matter to learn.
So, midterms, the point is this: can you try the steady trickle method instead of always coming in a sudden flood? I’m drowning, here. Help us out a little!
Pleading again for academic mercy,
Stressed Stacey
I find myself constantly worrying about the future. Where am I going? What will happen after I graduate? Will I ever be able to figure it all out?
What are my passions? How am I going to make money? Will I be a sellout? Will I be okay with that? Who am I going to be in five years? How many regrets will I have?
Will I make the right decisions? What are the right decisions? What are even my options? Will I ever shake this feeling that I need something more? Will I ever truly be content with my life? Will I ever live up to my potential? What even is my potential? Will I ever forgive myself for my past mistakes? How much will those mistakes affect my future?
What’s my GPA? Why does my life revolve around my GPA? What if I had spent more time on that one stupid essay? Would I have more opportunities now? Have I already fucked everything up?
Will I be mediocre? Is there anything wrong with being mediocre? Does mediocre even mean anything? Should I be going out more? Should I be going out less? Am I a disappointment? To myself? To my family?
Should I worry about wrinkles and wear more sunscreen? Why does everyone seem to have all their shit figured out? What’s wrong with me? Am I just slower than everyone else? Do I just take longer to realize what’s important?
Does it even matter? Does any of it even matter? Aren’t we all just tiny, insignificant specks in a gigantic and relentlessly futile universe where none of our lives will ever truly amount to anything and in only a matter of decades I will be erased from the earth, totally forgotten? So why do I take myself so seriously?
I feel like there’s something chasing me all the time. I feel like it’s always been chasing me, but it’s been too far behind for me to worry except for some random, unperiodic panic attacks. But recently, I’ve slowed my pace, or maybe this thing that’s chasing me has started moving faster. Either way, I know that it’s gaining on me and that very soon it’s going to consume me whole. When I’m reading or writing or drinking or in the middle of a yoga pose, my heart beats unusually fast and I succumb to a kind of anxiety that erupts from the very pits of my gut and spreads to my shoulders and knees and fingertips and even slow, deep breaths don’t do any good. I ask myself, is this an emotional breakdown? And then I only want to scream, “ENOUGH WITH THE QUESTIONS!!!”
Everyone tells us that we’re overreacting, that we have time to figure it out, that we should enjoy these years. And everyone mocks the twenty-somethings and finds us vain, arrogant, self-indulgent, dramatic, immature, ignorant, ungrateful and exploitative of technology.
But school, is hard. Figuring out your life, is hard. In my brain, I understand that I have time to make mistakes and learn from them. But in my stomach, in my heart, in that place where fears, insecurities, mental health issues, paranoia, and anxiety (damn that anxiety) are all produced – I feel like time is running out, and that my life is a ticking bomb, and that if I don’t find the perfect solution to all these so-called imaginary problems immediately, I will be a failure.
And then I sometimes wonder if ambition is overrated. I spent long stretches of time this past summer being gloriously lazy and carefree. I went for long runs and long picnics. I learned how to paint and then I spent many nights awake painting and slept in like it was Saturday and the day after my last exam. I only read when I felt like it. I wasted a lot of money on brunch. I spent hours in the kitchen cooking Indian dinners. But everyone around me was moving, doing, studying, accomplishing. I felt guilty.
Did all their movements and accomplishments mean that their summers were inherently more meaningful? And mine was silly and frivolous?
What if there was a freak accident and the world was wiped and tomorrow we were all lying in our deathbeds? Would I regret my indolence?
When I am in my most meditative state, when I feel old and wise and can see clearly – I decide no.
I decide that in the minutes leading up to my death, I would probably wish for just one more morning where I could wake up after 10 and make a giant cup of coffee and sip it until lunch while rereading Harry Potter.
@baharoh
Matthew Greenacre / Student Health Education Centre
One of the best pieces of advice given by a professor must have been when Dr. Valliant told his first year chemistry class about to take a midterm to “think by the seat of your pants.” Though it seems like an odd phrase, it makes sense. Often when students come to a question they find unfamiliar, something that they cannot remember studying, they get anxious and waste time sweating and fumbling to search their memory. Instead it helps a lot more to sit back, breathe, and think about the question. Just wing it. After all, it’s just a question, and this way you might reason through it.
Test anxiety, or simply worrying about presentations, papers, and readings can be absolutely debilitating. Students can easily become overwhelmed, fret about doing their work and wind up watching seasons and seasons of online TV instead of beginning a paper or cracking their textbook open. Then when there is no other option but to frantically pour over their notes, or pull an all-nighter writing, the student often winds up unhappy with their work. Finding yourself in this situation is not simply about intelligence, or a matter of having a poor work ethic. Indeed, it’s quite the opposite. It is the difference between striving for success and being driven by the prospect of failure. The subtle difference between these two states is all about one’s attitude to work. Being able to see it as a challenge that one will enjoy taking on, like a puzzle, or it can just be, well, hard work.
Making the switch can be much harder for some than others. For many students, it can be as simple as taking a deep breath during our exam, being okay with not knowing the answer, and then giving “thinking by the seat of your pants” a try. However, those who might find this unthinkable, and who have a lot of trouble quelling their anxiety on a day-to-day basis could really benefit from taking the time to sit back and actually clear their mind.
A long history of studies going back to pioneering work of Jon Kabat-Zinn (a professor at the University of Massachusetts Medical School) in the 1970’s and ‘80’s have found that meditation reduces stress and anxiety, and even chronic pain. Now, before dismissing this article as a sneaky attempt to get you into saffron robes, lighting incense and hanging around with hippies, please note that meditation does not have to involve any of those things, unless you really want it to. It is really is more about taking a deep breath, letting go of your worry and being able to deal with your problems. Also, for most of us, stress is mental, not physical pain like as hunger, so it makes sense that we should be able to use our minds to release this stress.
Mindfulness-meditation in particular is about being able to let go of your fears by focusing on the moment. Because, when you think about it, fears are just a manifestation of the feeling that something bad will happen. By being in the moment you do not make those pessimistic assumptions in the first place. That does not mean that you no longer think the thoughts that worry you, but rather you just calmly choose not to follow these trains of thought. What is known as focused attention meditation is the painstaking practice of focusing on a single thing or sensation, noticing when you’ve been distracted by something else, and then bringing your attention back to what you are supposed to be focusing on. By practicing this, you train yourself to see the problem in front of you clearly, helping you figure out how to solve it, while learning not to automatically get nervous about the “what if’s.” Research at universities in Beijing, Oregon and Dalian have found that meditation effectively improves one’s attention and self-discipline, which is not surprising if one is spending an appreciable amount of time focusing intently on something very boring, such as breathing.
So given that, it’s understandable that meditation is not everyone’s cup of ginseng infusion, but if you are having trouble with stress it is important to take the time to deal with it. This time is never wasted, because less stress lets you focus and be more productive when you are doing work. Exercise is one of the best ways to relieve stress, as is spending time with friends. However, if you are interested in meditation resources to learn more about it and help you get started are posted on the SHEC Blog, which you can visit at www.shecmcmaster.tumblr.com.
Sarah O’Connor / Silhouette Staff
It is only natural that we compare ourselves to other people. This need follows us up to the point when it’s career time, when we start making our way in the world and start comparing ourselves to others who have been in the same career paths as us. We start to doubt ourselves.
Using literary terms, this is called the anxiety of influence. This is when writers feel anxious and can’t help compare themselves to writers of the past and how great they are.
As a writer, I have experienced this. I dream of pursuing writing whether professionally or on the side but can’t help and compare myself to the writer’s that we are forced to read in high school, the ones worthy enough to be studied. When thinking from such a large spectrum, I can’t help but doubt myself.
But I’ve been trying hard to break out of my own personal anxiety of influence. I write here for The Silhouette and as much as I love doing it there is one thing I can’t do when writing for The Silhouette - I can’t write creatively. I can’t just submit a fictional story or poem to the opinions section; I have to write about real things. That’s what a paper’s for.
So when I spotted the chance to break out of my creative anxiety of influence, I jumped at the chance.
Word Nest is a new program aired on the McMaster Radio Station. It’s a segment where writers read and then critique one anothers’ works on air while also discussing areas of inspiration and different writing styles.
The idea intrigued me. Getting to read some of my work on air, actually getting it out there for people to hear and to possibly enjoy sounded amazing. I joined immediately, curious of who else would take the risk of reading his or her personal work on air for everyone to hear.
I was surprised by the outcome – there were only four of us including the production manager. But as we walked into the empty recording room, energy flowed between us. We were strangers, all of us, connected by the love of words and the need to share them. And it began.
We each read our work, three poems and a short story. A quiver in our voice, our eyes glued to our words that stared back at us. My heart pumped and shivered with excitement as I read these familiar words to strangers, anxious and curious at their response.
And I was surprised by the confidence and fear they had - the readiness and hesitation to read their work and how everyone smiled when they finished.
Each of us was awe-struck, amazed at the each other’s talents. We critiqued each other’s work asking our favourite lines to be read again, explaining the inspiration behind the words that had been private for so long.
And like everything good, it ended too soon. We said our goodbyes and left the room no longer strangers. Each of us had read something private, something we’d held close to our hearts, something that was a part of us.
True, our words weren’t published in a book or even a paper, but they were said, they were spoken.
I don’t think the anxiety of influence should be defined only for the writers. I believe everyone has his or her own personal anxiety of influence. How will we ever be as good as they are? How will we reach their level? Why did we do this?
But we are and we can. What we need to remember is others can inspire us but we can’t compare ourselves to them. We are our own person and are capable of anything we set our mind to.
I don’t know how many people turn on their radios to hear four girls reading and critiquing each other’s stories and poems. But I won’t be trapped in by the anxiety of influence. And I don’t think you should be trapped either.
