By: Mitali Chaudhary
How do you meet someone out of the blue, and proceed to talk about everything and nothing at all for extended periods of time? How do you navigate that fine line between questioning someone and asking smart questions? How do you practice the art of small talk without looking like you’re conducting a study on human social behaviour? For an introvert, surviving a bout of small talk is matter of life and death, but these tips will make it more like a casual stroll in the park.
To get someone talking about him or herself, ask general questions. Once you get them talking, half the work is already done and all you have to do is be a good listener. This includes asking questions for clarification to show continuing interest, when appropriate, as well as maintaining casual eye contact and actually listening.
This especially applies if you’ve only recently met and are still in that sort-of-strangers stage. If you’re at a party, you could start a dialogue about how you both know the host, how the food/drinks are or how the people seem so far. This can then serve as a segue to more personal topics (but not too personal! See point #3).
Remember, it’s a simple conversation, not a job interview. Even though you’re trying to get to know someone, there’s no need for a rapid fire round of questions probing into someone’s personal life and experiences, nor does it add anything to the conversation if you aren’t familiar with the subject matter that you’re asking about. For example, if you don’t watch hockey and ask the other person whether they do, it could stilt the conversation since you probably won’t know what to say after they have responded.
Your interest and excitement will show naturally if you talk about a hobby that you have or an activity you really enjoy partaking in. You’ll also be able to answer any questions easily and your unique personality will also show. However, it’s important to note that conversations are reciprocal. If one of you is doing all the talking, that’s a monologue, not a conversation. Be mindful to not become that person.
Note that this doesn’t mean “be an asshole”. Instead, try to relax and show that you’re comfortable. This will put others, and yourself, at ease and will let the conversation between you flow more easily.
By: Grace Bocking
Although you may hear cynics of the world claiming that long-distance relationships don’t work, don’t let them discourage you—at least, not if it’s a friendship. While keeping the spark alive in a romance may not be easy when there’s endless miles separating a couple, friendships can often endure a lot more stress. That is, if you know what you’re doing.
Here’s a word to the wise: even though your first instinct is going to be to start strategising ways to stay in touch, don’t count on being able to keep all your promises. The game plan you and your buddy come up with may work at first, but you won’t be able to maintain daily Skype sessions. No matter how much you love them, the world around you is going to be one big distraction. Learn to lower your expectations, be flexible, and don’t put so much pressure on yourselves. This will be an adjustment if you’re used to seeing each other every day, but it will teach you to have faith in the strength of your friendship. If you do feel the need for daily updates, try using Snapchat. You won’t want this to be your only form of communication, but it’s great for quick updates.
It’s also important to note that even though you’ll miss your friend like crazy, every email doesn’t need to be an expression of your undying devotion. This gets stale really fast, and it can be difficult to reciprocate. Don’t say it unless you really mean it, because if you say it too much it won’t mean anything at all. If you’re worried that they’re going to forget about you, try to remind yourself that they probably feel the same way. Their world is going to keep on spinning without you, but this doesn’t mean that they don’t wish you were there.
The truth is that if your friendship was built on convenience, its structural walls probably won’t be able to withstand the stress. Maintaining a long-distance friendship takes equal effort from both parties, and at the end of the day, it will only work if you both want it to. Still, if you truly value each other, not even distance will be able to tear you apart.
Maryssa Barras
The Silhouette Intern
Alumni Association hosts Welcome Wednesdays
Starting on Jan. 23 the McMaster Alumni Association will be hosting Welcome Wednesdays. Once a month students will be welcome to visit the Alumni House for free coffee and bagels from 9:30 a.m. to 11:30 a.m. Members of the Student Relations Committee will be present for information on how to get involved on campus. Registration is required and free at alumni.os.mcmaster.ca.
New mentorship program launched
On Jan. 23, Communication Studies and Multimedia unveiled a new mentorship program where upper-year students are paired with first and second-year students. A meet and greet social was held to introduce and pair up mentors with mentees. This program was the result of a student-led initiative and will have continued socials for mentors and mentees to bond.
City of Hamilton issues cold weather alert
There is a cold weather alert for the City of Hamilton as of Jan. 18. Cold weather alerts mean that temperatures are expected to go to or below -15 C. The cold weather could reach up to 10 degrees lower than average for this time of year, is expected to last all week, and could potentially warm up over the weekend. Students should be advised that the cold-warm trend will continue for the weeks to come.
Humanities launches Experiential Ed. centre
The Faculty of Humanities is launching the Humanities Target Learning & Experiential Education Centre (HTLC). Funded by the Faculty of Humanities and full-time Humanities students, the HTLC was passed by students through the McMaster Humanities Society Referendum with the goal of increasing career exploration an experiential opportunities for Humanities students, and will be hosting events throughout the semester for interested students. The official launch is on Jan. 21 in CIBC Hall at 10:30 a.m. Students, faculty and staff are all welcome.
Study finds 905 residents oppose austerity cuts
A new study by the Ontario Confederation of University Faculty Associations (OCUFA) found that over two thirds of residents in the 905 region of Hamilton do not want the governments deficit-cutting agenda to compromise the quality of university education in the province. 86 percent of residents oppose university funding cuts, and 75 percent oppose shifting the cost of higher education onto students with higher tuition fees.
Guests from Ontario universities, local artistic practitioners and professionals in the multimedia industry came together on Nov. 7 and 8 for the inaugural “macGRID” conference and workshop.
Spearheaded by David Harris-Smith, Assistant Professor in Communication Studies and Multimedia, the conference was centered on the growth and development of the macGRID community: a simulation research network formed around high-performance virtual world software. The software, OpenSim, uses mixed reality and avatar technology to develop virtual connections between the university and practicing artists and professionals in the multimedia and motion graphics industry.
“The macGRID community has been designed to be redesigned,” explained Harris-Smith as he welcomed numerous representatives from the design industry to the first day of the conference.
“Our goal is to bring together researchers and practitioners through education, simulation, training and artistic expression to facilitate networking and collaborative research.”
The macGRID community was developed to link together the physical and virtual world in a mixed reality that would involve computational manipulation to create any desired output. The intended purpose of the system is to allow researchers and artists to continue their work in the virtual world when the physical world is unable to provide the desired resources. The grid would be able to bridge long-distance connections and overcome limitations of the physical body by providing virtual means for movement and action.
Key note speaker Alan Sondheim – author, teacher, cyberspace theorist, tornado chaser and self-professed “independent scholar” – braved Hurricane Sandy to leave his New York home and open the conference with a discussion on the object of “real.” He explained that although physical bodies can be binding, virtual reality systems allow for a branching away from physical limitations.
“Virtual worlds were God’s gift – that is, if there were a God, but there isn’t – to humanity,” he said in his talk. “You can have someone log in from China, Denmark, Africa ... and have them join in, help us, work with us,” he explained as he discussed the endless possibilities of working through virtual realities.
Sondheim not only discussed the practical applications of the technology, but also the artistic. He showcased a series of videos he developed through the manipulation of motion graphic technology that was then electronically transferred and showcased through avatar characters and creations.
The conference continued on through the Thursday, featuring a series of guest research presenters discussing their plans and intentions for the macGRID community.
Professor Harris-Smith hopes to continue developing university-industry bonds through this endeavour and use virtual worlds and mixed reality as a platform for social and scientific experiment. The grid is growing and physical boundaries are gradually being lifted to include broader research options.
After over seventy-five years of invading our eyes, ears and minds with national and international news and information, the CBC is ready to open its own mind to a larger dialogue.
Friends of Canadian Broadcasting (FRIENDS) hosted a public forum dubbed “The CBC We Want” Tuesday afternoon in Innovation Park. The goal of the event was to foster an open discussion between key Hamilton media personalities and any Hamiltonians who had a bone to pick with the national media organization.
This dialogue was spurred on by the upcoming CBC license renewal, an event that is the first of its kind, as the CRTC reviews the funding allocated to the non-profit media provider. This event promised the direction of major concerns and suggestions towards the CRTC in time for the review process, the deadline for which is this Friday, and facilitated the procedure through the use of an individual video booth where attendees could film one-minute proposals to the review board.
“For many years, the CBC has been an integral player in promoting discussion,” said McMaster President Patrick Deane, as he commenced the event and welcomed to the stage the moderator and former prima ballerina Veronica Tennant.
“Many of us are disappointed in the continued budget cuts to the CBC,” said Tennant as she introduced the six panelists responsible for responding to questions raised by the audience later in the event, each an expert in the field in their own right.
The event marks the penultimate stop in the eight-city tour that has already hit Victoria to Halifax and most of central Canada, ending in Kingston on Oct. 11.
After a brief recess to meet the panelists, the event resumed and the floor was open to questions from the audience.
An audience member asked the panel if the CBC would become irrelevant in the future due to subsequent budget cuts. Philip Savage, McMaster Associate Professor of Communication Studies answered, “Canada and the CBC is the most efficient by far [in their funding model], the problem is when you get to that point when CBC can no longer work from a [non-profit] basis.”
The CRTC review process will begin after the deadline for submission closes this Friday, Oct. 12. For the first time in 76 years citizens of Canada have a chance to either redefine or maintain the mandate of the CBC to educate, enlighten and inform.
