If you’re a Mac student (which I assume most of you are), you’re either living at home, in residence, or off campus. Yet regardless of your living situation, there is one thing that is nearly impossible to avoid: your neighbors.
I find neighbors encompass one of three key categories: the good, the bad or the ugly. Let’s not be pessimists, and begin with the “good” neighbors with whom you should befriend.
How do you tell if you have good neighbors? Well for a start, they probably invite you to their parties, open their beer stocked fridges for you, and tell you to take whatever you’d like. Or how about the neighbors who don’t say anything when they see the girl from last night sneak down the hall the next morning.
The “good” neighbors turn a blind eye to things they just weren’t supposed to see, are generous with their possessions, direct the pizza guy right to your place, and maybe even act as a cuddle buddy from time to time (if that’s what you’re looking for).
On the opposite end of the spectrum are the “bad” neighbors, which can be separated into various degrees of nastiness dependent upon your discretion, and are best to avoid. They call the cops on your intoxicated friend who was just in the middle of her eerily realistic rendition of Wrecking Ball, watch everything you do with judging glares, and tell your parents the somewhat less notable stories about you when your monthly delivery of Kraft Dinner comes in.
The bad neighbors rightfully believe they own the whole block, the whole floor, and, essentially, your whole life. I’m sure we’ve all encountered them at some point, and they’re certainly not the angels they try to appear to be. They park in your parking space, steal your Wi-Fi and complain about even the slightest squeak of noise after 9 p.m. despite their own music has been seeping through the walls the whole time. In conclusion, it is definitely best to avoid these neighbors, because neither friendship nor mutual agreement is an option. Any friendly relation is a lost cause, so just abandon the ship now.
Last but not least are the “ugly” neighbors. The ugly neighbors are not esthetically ugly, but habitually ugly. When it comes to creatures of foul habit, it is best to proceed with caution. They tend to leave garbage sitting out for so long that the smell eventually wafts in through your window, and bang on your door at 5 a.m. to tell you about something they found really, really, *hiccup*, really, hilarious. Not to mention they invite themselves over way too often to be considered a spontaneous surprise. You don’t have the heart to tell them to leave your house, especially to stop coming over for their favourite “movie nights” where they happen to forget to bring the movie and treats each and every time.
The “ugly” neighbors play dubstep obnoxiously loud in the hopes to convert you to their superior music taste. They’re hopelessly inconsiderate, but blissfully unaware they’re doing anything wrong. After all, they’re just having fun, right? They ward off neighborhood wildlife with BB guns, thinking it’s objectively hilarious to torment squirrels. But no matter how riled up you may get with these folks, it is best to proceed with caution because you do not want to hurt their feelings. They may be so upset that they actually never end up leaving their house, stuck in a wallowing party that not even the loudest of dubstep music can revive them from, and consequently the old lettuce smell and ear-bleeding house music will become a permanent part of your life.
Whatever your neighbor situation is, remember these neighbor profiles. Good or bad neighbors can influence how you live, your experience here at McMaster, and your life beyond graduation too. Neighborly love is on the decline, with fewer street BBQ’s and friendly neighbor introductions. Most people tend to stick to themselves, as opposed to socializing with those that live around them. Ultimately, however you decide to proceed with your neighbors, just remember this note of optimism: everyone moves eventually, right?