Local speeding dating project is creating an inclusive space for dating and reconnecting community following the pandemic
Happy Hour Speeding Dating sets out to have people meet face-to-face before "swiping right". Their host events for different age groups and sexual and gender orientations with the aim of being a safe space for those who attend.
Samantha Bendo, the creator, formulated this idea in the midst of the COVID-19 pandemic. While on maternity leave, she had found herself wanting to give space to people to meet in-person, after such a long period of isolation.
“After COVID it was just very, very weird. I feel like people [were] disconnected [and] kind of scared of each other. So I just felt like it would be a nice thing to bring people together. Obviously, if people find love then that’s kind of an extra bonus but I just thought it would be a positive way to reconnect the community,” said Bendo.
Bendo had worked part-time as a bartender at Side Door Bar and is friends with Jackie Lagos, one of the owners. Lagos was kind enough to help bring her idea into real life by providing space.
The Side Door Bar themselves opened in 2019, just as the pandemic hit, and overcame the struggle of maintaining a business during lockdowns. The bar hosts many of events, such as vintage markets, pop-ups and trivia nights. Like many of these events, Happy Hour Speed Dating served as another way to reach out to more people for the bar.
“[Side Door Bar] had been struggling throughout [COVID-19] to get people in the bar. They had to pivot; they did a lot of take-home cocktails and were really creative to keep the bar open during the pandemic. [Happy Hour Speed Dating] is a post-pandemic way of getting people to the bar—getting people to connect,” said Bendo.
Bendo runs these speed dating events entirely on her own, as she does social media work, promotions and execution of the events. With an undergraduate degree in English and Multimedia from McMaster and a marketing degree from Mohawk, Bendo has a strong background in the work she does and she enjoys herself while doing it.
For each Happy Hour Speed Dating event, Bendo organizes the sign-ups and attempts to have a balanced distribution of genders. For instance, for heterosexual-oriented events, she aims to have around 10 men and 10 women-identifying attendees. Once this is confirmed, usually 48 hours before an event, instructions are sent on how the night itself will be conducted.
“If you purchase a ticket the first thing that happens is I send you an email — like a feedback form. That’s just a little bit of information about you: your name, age, how you heard about us, location. . .and what events you’d like to see,” said Bendo.
Over the summer they did patio events but have since transitioned to indoor events given the weather change. Outdoor events start with entering the Side Door Bar at 7:15 p.m. latest. Each ticket comes with a complimentary drink of choice. From there, attendees can purchase additional drinks at their happy hour rate.
Bendo will then commence the night with a few words, announcing the start the speed dating portion of the night. Throughout the event, there are breaks and it’s concluded by a final portion of the night to meet with everyone.
Bendo hopes to foster a safe space for people to talk while meeting. During her opening remarks, she highlights how it’s a night to meet people. Every event she’s hosted so far has had a zero-tolerance policy for any form of offensive behaviour towards others. Despite this, she shared how she’s not experienced any hostile people as everyone comes to the event with a common goal of friendly socialization and reconnection with others in the community.
“I do make sure it is a safe space. Anyone that’s rude, you’re gone. We do have a no-tolerance policy. It’s not written [but enforced],” said Bendo.
Happy Hour Speed Dating was born in the midst of the pandemic as an opportunity for folks to connect with people beyond their screens. Not every connection formed must be romantic, but it’s an open door to try.
How the Aphrodite Project and similar projects have changed dating
As the pandemic continues to surge and COVID-19 regulations remain in place, many are finding romance and fun. From dating apps to newly-designed matching algorithms, students are being matched by the thousands from the comfort of their beds. This is especially true when it comes to university students in Canada, including at McMaster.
Rates of online dating usage have increased since the beginning of the pandemic. Tinder, Hinge, OKCupid and many other apps have all reported increased use.
However, in addition to a rise in online dating app usage, there have been many innovative projects seeking to help students bound to their homes and laptops find a match.
Perhaps most notable among these projects is the Aphrodite Project. The Aphrodite Project is an algorithm that matches students based on their responses in a long questionnaire.
The project was designed by two University of Toronto exchange students, with the first trial of the software having been trialled in Singapore in 2019. After it was clear the algorithm was a success and full of promise, it was adapted to Canadian universities, starting with U of T and the University of Waterloo.
The site is now open to students across many universities, including McMaster. For many, this algorithm was a success and a way to find love and happiness amid the pandemic.
Among students who found love through this algorithm last year is Karin Lie, a fourth-year student at the University of Waterloo studying psychology.
“I was very impressed,” Lie explained. “We did get along very well.”
The first batch of matching in Canada was completed in 2020, with thousands of students being matched prior to Valentine’s Day. The developers of the Aphrodite Project even opened up a special version of their algorithm, Aphrodite Project: Pandemic Edition.
This targeted students amid the onset of the pandemic, which hoped to offer students an opportunity to meet someone and be distracted from the gloomy times of 2020.
In addition to the Aphrodite Project designed by students at U of T, there are similar projects that have been designed specifically for students at Mac. Among these are Match At Mac, which was run over the summer of 2020 and Mac Aphrodite Project.
These operate similarly to the Aphrodite Project designed at U of T in which Mac students fill out questionnaires and are matched with what is calculated to be the best possible option. Students participating in the Mac Aphrodite Project received their matches on Feb. 13, 2021.
These projects are important this year, as the transition to online learning at universities has presented challenges to many, with fewer opportunities available for socializing and romance. For many students, these algorithms offer a more thoughtful and personalized way to meet potential matches that involves more than swiping right or left.
Although romance and love are obviously never guaranteed, these platforms offer a new and unique way to meet people. As an alternative to conventional dating applications, more personalized platforms like Aphrodite Project have the potential to become pivotal to online dating and match-making.
Among the students frustrated with dating apps during the pandemic is Abby Liznick, a second-year health sciences student at McMaster.
“At a time when we are all longing for a connection and the ability to spend quality time with others, many turn to dating apps to find instant companionship,” said Liznick. “While these connections temporarily fill the social void left by the pandemic, they are just that — only temporary.”
These matchmaking projects are a testament to the adaptability and innovation people have come up during the pandemic. They offer a glimmer of hope for those who are unable to otherwise experience romance or socializing due to the social restrictions, especially those who are hesitant to try online dating apps.
Marzan Hamid, a second-year health sciences student, took a chance over the summer of 2020 and completed the Match At Mac questionnaire, eventually to be matched with someone later that year.
“I think it’s really great that students are taking the initiative to connect others, especially during these unique circumstances,” explained Hamid. “It’s nice to find out that there are still creative ways to meet new people even during a pandemic. I’m sure this will benefit many of my peers!”
“I think it’s really great that students are taking the initiative to connect others, especially during these unique circumstances,” explained Hamid. “It’s nice to find out that there are still creative ways to meet new people even during a pandemic. I’m sure this will benefit many of my peers!”
Thousands of people have been matched by recently-made dating algorithms. This is in addition to the huge rise in usage of dating apps like Tinder since the pandemic began. The future looks bright for dating among university students stuck at home.
