[thesil_related_posts_sc]Related Posts[/thesil_related_posts_sc]
Sex and the Steel City has made its rounds over the years.
Whether it was moving on from a totally separate issue to an insert, reviving it from the dead after it was put to rest in 2014 or making the decision to not distribute 8,000 copies of full-on porn around campus and the community, looking through the SATSC archives is both hilarious and moving.
Special issues are a lot of work. Every aspect of this issue has a meticulous planning process and an entire team of staff and volunteers to get the job done. This year’s edition of SATSC was no exception.
On top of making sure that our regular, 28-page issue is both high-quality and on stands on time, our staff worked around the clock looking for submissions, editing content, laying out pages and planning a launch party. Razan Samara, our Arts & Culture editor, spent months planning the issue, from working and reworking our page count, layouts or what the cover might look like. Some of our contributors did double their paid workload in order to get this issue on stands.
Despite the various planning meetings, extra hours in the office, stress headaches and way too much coffee, we got it done, and it looks incredible.
We published the last Sex and the Steel City magazine in February 2016. The 32-page issue was distributed at the same time as our weekly paper and despite its popularity, was cut the following year due to budget cuts and complaints about the fact that it was NSFW.
After floating the idea around how to bring it back last year, we revived the special edition in the form of a some extra pages in our Arts and Culture section. We strayed from our traditional format about writing about sex for the sake of writing about sex and instead published pieces surrounding sex, health and relationships.
This year, we decided to follow suit, putting in an additional 12 glossy pages filled with artwork, information about LGBTQ2SA+ friendly spaces in Hamilton and several pieces on sexual health and wellness. We also added our feature and sports section to the fun with some themed articles and decided to have a launch party for it — which you should come to, tonight at Redchurch Cafe from 7 p.m. to 11 p.m.
Special issues allow our staff and contributors to stray from our usual content and dive into topics that interest them, never minding what may be too taboo for our weekly issue. It allows our production team to really show off how talented they are. Most importantly, it allows us to stray from the ordinary and be as creative as we want.
Jennifer Bacher
The Silhouette
For the past week I have had the pleasure of trying out a dating app called Tinder. Tinder uses your Facebook information along with your location to match you with potential people in your location.
It shows your likes and five chosen photos from Facebook along with your age. Users can then set the minimum and maximum age, gender and the maximum radial distance away from their potential matches.
After the initial set up, you are then matched with people in your area and a simple “swipe” game of what is essentially “hot or not” begins. A match is made when both parties swipe a yes to each other, after which you are then allowed to chat with that person. What happens from there is up to you.
At first I was taken back from the over simplicity and vanity of Tinder but essentially this is what happens in any bar, club or party. You judge a person on their looks first, and if you say you don’t, you’re just lying to yourself.
Is it right? No, but it’s the truth. You “check out” first and if you like what you see, you go over and talk. If they do not return the attention, it’s over. This is exactly what Tinder is without the awkward denial.
Some words of advice for those of you who wish to use Tinder to find a hook-up (or relationship, miracles do happen):
Fall is the perfect season to fall out of love. Plants are slowly dying. Midterms make you feel like you’re slowly dying. You might as well use this time to also write out the epitaph for your heart.
Right around the time when the leaves start changing and the weather begins to shift, some of us may be experiencing another surprising and potentially unwelcome change- getting dumped.
With a cold autumn comes a cold heartbreak. And on that weekend when we should be carving into turkey and giving thanks for all the joys in our lives, you may actually be sobbing alone in your room listening to Simon and Garfunkel and binge-eating McDonalds.
The “turkey dump” is a phenomenon sweeping across the nation. Wiping out long distance relationships all over North America, and working to abolish the term “high school sweetheart” forever. Blatantly defined, the turkey dump is when a university or college student comes home after their month and a half of freedom and decides to put an end to their high school relationship. Come Thanksgiving weekend, many a couple will re-unite and quickly thereafter, break ties.
Now regardless of whether you’re the dumper or the dumpee, the turkey dump will take some effort to get over. You’re saying goodbye to the person you naively believed to be your soul mate on a weekend meant for celebration, that’s gotta hurt. So here are some words of encouragement to help you get through this tough time and find something new to be thankful for this holiday season.
The Dumper
So you’re planning on turkey dumping your significant other? Or should I now say insignificant other? Regardless, good on you. Working up the courage to put an end to something that once seemed promising is a difficult task.
If you find that your relationship has been growing weaker, or your wandering eye may potentially become a problem, ending the bond is a good idea.
But remember, let your partner down easy (read: an e-card is not the way to go). Getting dumped over thanksgiving dinner can’t be easily sugar-coated.
The Dumpee
So, you think you might be getting turkey dumped by your significant other? We’ve all experienced the cut and run at one point in time or another, so there’s no need to feel ashamed or embarrassed.
Dissolve your sadness in gravy and stuffing. Bask in the glory of copious amounts of food. This may be the only time in your life when emotional eating will be socially acceptable.
If you are neither the dumper or the dumpee, be thankful that this holiday season you aren’t the one falling out of love. Enjoy your dinner and send hopeful wishes to those experiencing the wrath coming from the tail end of the turkey.
Ana Qarri
The Silhouette
While the Student Union is trying to convince you to #DiscoverYourCity, I’m here to convince you that if you’re looking for a romantic getaway it’s time to #DiscoverYourUnderConstructionCampus.
With a variety of fenced off areas, dug out pavement, and safety hazards to choose from, you could really give your date that certain ‘je ne sais quoi’ it’s been missing.
If you are starting your day of romance on Main and Emerson, your first stop should naturally be the beautiful new addition to our campus: that slightly awkward hill that was once densely vegetated.
Slowly walk around the hill before you take a seat on one of the benches. It is completely understandable if you hesitate to do so due to the jaw-dropping architectural design of these masterpieces. The tiny seat dividers found on the benches will serve as a reminder that you need to get to know your date before getting serious. It’s all in the bylaw.
Have a great conversation with your date while enjoying the serene sounds of Main Street West.
After life stories have been shared, start walking towards the student centre. As you approach the front doors, point out the location of the future Starbucks – a place of historical significance. Soon, the ability to walk through this hallway without making uncomfortable body contact with someone else will become a thing of the past, remembered only by those who lived to see both eras.
Walk to the MUSC Atrium where you will find the fireplace. Take a seat with your date, and observe the movement of Mac students. Think that this is nature at its best and give your date a knowing smile. They’re probably thinking the same thing.
The next stop is (obviously) the nuclear reactor. You can’t miss this one. It stands tall on the west side of campus as a constant reminder of death to those who fear heights. The university has conveniently placed a picnic table next to the reactor building, acknowledging the frequent use of this location as a romantic spot. (Pro-tip: the strange structure of the General Sciences Building makes for some good hidden make-out spots. Proceed at your own risk.)
If your date is still sticking around, you’ve got yourself a keeper. At this point, the route you take is totally up to you. If plants and mosquitoes are your thing, head down to Cootes. If you haven’t had enough of construction zones, take a walk to the Wilson Building and pay a visit to the statue by MDCL. If you want to look at the blue skies of Hamilton, there’s the Ten Acre field.
The possibilities are endless. McMaster is your oyster.
(Guess which titles we made up, and which ones we read at Cosmo.com)
Legitimate Cosmo titles are marked with a *
538 ways to get your partner to climax
That’s just unreasonable.
Are you a Betty or a Veronica in bed?
Is your name Veronica or Elizabeth? No? Then probably not.
*How to get an orgasm while sitting on the dryer
Honestly we have no idea.
*What to do when your va-jay-jay feels weird after sex
Visit your gynecologist! Seriously. We have no idea what’s going on with you down there. We’ve probably never even met.
Best erogenous zones
Your junk.
*Handjobs for beginners
Actually we were going to run this, but ran out of issues. Look for it next year!
How to let him know what you want in bed
Talk to him. Email him. Text him. Use your words.
*What do real men think about cleavage?
Not really sure of the distinction between “men” and “real men.” Probably has nothing to do with what they think about cleavage.
Tips and tricks to tell if your crush is into you
If they say “yes” when you ask them if they like you, that’s usually a pretty good sign.
*Preparing for your first holiday with your manfriend
I don’t recommend a family vacation.
The Forbidden Fruit: Incorporating food into your love life
So long as it doesn’t involve deep-frying and/or barbecuing you’re pretty much in the clear.
How to please your man
Blowjobs. Seriously. That’s all these articles come down to.
Ana Qarri / Silhouette Staff
The world as you know it has come to an end. You feel alone, weak and betrayed. You might be tempted to simply give up, but we think you’re great and we want you to be happy. Here are some suggestions on how to survive your break-up apocalypse, as adapted from the movie “Zombieland”:
Rule 1: Cardio
Get out of bed. Wallowing in self-pity is helpful and healthy for the first few days, but once you hit the one week mark, it’s time to get moving. It’s not going to be easy. Everything you do and see will remind you of things that make you sad. That’s fine. Closure and enclosure might sound the same, but while some enclosure will give you time to think and deal with your feelings, too much of it will be ultimately detrimental to moving on. Physical activity also makes you happier and lowers your stress levels. The author can neither confirm nor deny this, but it sounds about right.
Rule 2: The Double Tap
If you have something to say to your ex, always think twice. It’s very possible that they don’t want to hear what you have to say. It sucks and it’s hard, but you have to remember that your objective is to move on. Trying to convince them that they’ve made a mistake, or apologizing for yours, is probably not going to work. They’ve made a decision and if they’re moderately intelligent, they have already considered all options. You shouldn’t have to convince someone to stay in your life.
Rule 4: Seatbelts
(Not actually. This is just a really bad metaphor for your friends.) Remind yourself that they exist. These are people who care about you. Your ex isn’t the most important person in your life, and keeping or resuming contact with your friends will help you take your mind off that one person. Friends always have a way of making you feel better about yourself, so take full advantage of this support system. You deserve it.
Rule 32: Enjoy the Little Things
Start enjoying other things again. Having someone is nice, but there’s someone pretty awesome that you’ll always have: yourself. Take care of yourself. Take yourself out for a movie. Go on a walk with yourself. Make small memories that are yours. Only once you’ve realized that you are enough to make yourself happy, will you be able to move on. Breaking up with someone feels like you’ve had a part of yourself ripped off. The point isn’t to cover it up and wait for someone else to fill the void. The point is to fill it up yourself.
By: Em Kwissa
My first forays into the awkward and heated territory that is disrobing in front of another human being occurred in my junior year of high school. I was seventeen and I had already dated a few people, but with all my previous partners things had been kept strictly over-the-clothes. This particular relationship was markedly different in two ways. One, I was in love. Two, I no longer had any interest in pretending I wasn’t incredibly horny.
Arguably the most important part of sexual encounters of any kind is that everyone involved wants to be involved. There was no question that I was enthusiastic about the direction in which my boyfriend and I were headed and the speed at which we were getting there; the problem was, I wanted to be involved as someone else. I wanted to be someone with a flatter stomach, smaller thighs, and bigger breasts. I wanted to be someone hairless and devoid of unsexy bodily functions, someone who could contort into wild poses and who smelled and tasted like vanilla ice cream.
Thus, my first sexual relationship was a very sad thing. In preparing to go and see my boyfriend, I spent hours meticulously correcting every imperfect detail of my appearance. In spite of wanting very badly to get to the fun naked things I knew we could be doing, it took me forever to get out of my clothes, and once I was in the buff I became preoccupied with sucking in my stomach and tensing my thighs and pointing my toes and lying only on my side to make my cleavage look bigger, and you know what? None of those things are conducive to fun sex. Here I was with this boy I loved and who loved me (and who, for the record, thought I was beautiful every inch), and for some reason I thought that things like a tan or a six-pack would make the experience better.
Fast forward through three years of experiences in sex and identity and arrive at present-day me, twenty years old and still soft-bellied, small-breasted, and covered in razor-burn if I shave my legs too often. This isn’t a story about how I started working out and tanning and applying various creams and perfumes and memorizing the Kama Sutra. I realized very soon after my boyfriend and I broke up that those things wouldn’t make a difference. My problem wasn’t with my body; my problem was with me, and no matter how much I changed my appearance, if I continued to believe that pleasure was only attainable if I became some future, new-and-improved version of myself, I would always be able to find something new to pick at.
I fully support physical self-improvement as a means of bettering one’s health and happiness, but I was kidding myself that I couldn’t be happy until I looked a certain way. I have the same body I did three years ago. The difference is that now I want to do naked fun things lights on and comfortable, because it’s way easier to have a good time when you’re thinking about how awesome sex is instead of how much more awesome sex would be if you looked like someone else. Don’t let a hypothetical version of you upstage you in bed. You’re here. You’re horny. You’re hot as hell. Go get some, kid.
Stephen Clare / The Silhouette
Like all good Sex and the Steel City articles, this one starts with a calculus analogy. Imagine graphing a date, with time on the x-axis and quality on the y-axis. The function is a polynomial, with intriguing conversations on the peaks and bad jokes and boring stories on the down slopes. Now look for the inflection points: the changes in slope of the graph, when the date goes from good to bad (or vice versa).
Those moments are quiet ones. The dreaded awkward silences, the bane of every hopeful suitor’s existence. Many people feel the need to fill every minute of a date with conversation, thinking that even a few seconds of silence betrays their insecurity or plainness.
That’s not true, though. In fact, moments of silence can be the best part of any date. Yes, they can be awkward, but they also represent opportunity. When is there silence? At the end of a conversation, or before an answer to a question, or when both you and your date are taking a moment to think about how things are going. All of these are times when you have an opportunity to change the tone or direction of a date. A chance to bet a little more.
So use them. Don’t just sigh and say “So... what do you have planned for the summer?” That is boring and awkward. That’s why people fear the awkward silence.
Try to deepen the conversation by asking something more meaningful. Once you’ve got the hometowns and summer plans out of the way you can get more intimate in conversation (though of course you have to get comfortable through less personal talk first). Use the silence to make this transition.
The ultimate thing to do in a momentary silence is go DEFCON 1 and lean in for the kiss. It is your best opportunity, and if you keep waiting until the “perfect moment” you will go home disappointed. Now obviously this takes some finesse. Don’t go for it in the awkward beat after your date just finished telling you about how their dog got hit by a car or they didn’t get the job they wanted or something like that. But if an intense conversation just trailed off, and the room is quiet but also there’s this intense buzzing in your ears, and they’re kinda looking at you in that certain way where their head is tilted a bit to the left and their eyebrows are pricked slightly up, and nobody seems to want to talk anymore... well.
And that’s why I like awkward silences: they’re not a dead end, they’re an intersection. So don’t miss your exit. Make sure the slope of that graph keeps climbing.
