A serial killer's playlist
Everyone listens to music, even the heartless
Music resonates emotion within us, and for some this emotion inspires the urge to pick up a chainsaw no prescription viagra sale and kill the girl next door. Since it is Halloween, I find it only appropriate to enter the minds of the most menacing monsters, humans, and otherworldly characters to see just what’s spinning on their record players. Please be advised, terrible puns ahead.
Jigsaw from Saw – “Every Breath You Take” by The Police
If you listen to this song with the right mindset, you may feel as though you are being stalked. If your boyfriend puts this on a mix tape for you ladies, run, it’s bad enough Jigsaw is watching every step you take. Oh Sting – what have you done, first “Roxanne” and now this?
Hannibal Lecter – “Cannibal” by Ke$ha
Who would have imagined that the princess of pop would be singing about eating boys and devouring flesh? Glitter and twice-baked eyelids, oh what a beautiful combination. Fist pumping in the kitchen listening to cannibalistic dance pop, Hannibal puts on his pink rhinestone apron and gets down and dirty.
Freddy Krueger – “Sweet Dreams (Are Made of These)” by the Eurythmics and ‘Come Away With Me’ by Norah Jones.
Freddy thinks some of them actually want to be abused. Also, Freddy could slice up a victim while Nora’s jazzy vocals sing “come away with me in the night, and I’ll write you a song.”
Dexter Morgan – “Psycho Killer” by The Talking Heads
Dexter is confused, is he a good man doing bad things or a bad man doing good things? It’s safe to say maybe he’s both, but that he is definitely a little psycho. Lets be honest, who doesn’t want to sing “fa, fa, fa, fa, fa fa, fa, fa, fa” while zipping up a body bag.
Regan Macneil from The Exorcist – “Learning to Fly” by Tom Petty
Petty Regan has no wings, but she manages to levitate and proves that coming down really is the hardest thing. Overcoming possession is a serious milestone. Regan would be an Eminem girl, but she’s jealous because his projectile vomit in “Lose Yourself” was more impressive.